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TEFLChina Teahouse: Life: Culture:
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Re: culture shocked!
Xiong says:
"For many years, I've gone to the movies about every week; it's my standard
remedy for depression."
Xiong, we finally caved in and bought a small, portable VCD/CD player that plugs into our TV. Movies are 10 kwai apiece. We return or exchange about every third one we get (glitches, not in English, whatever) but that library of VCDs is our escape when we have an "I don't want to be in China" day.
Get a friend to show you the characters that say "two languages" on the box. One of those languages may turn out to be Serbo-Croatian, but . . . . . it's a start. We just ask: "Meiyiguo hwa?" Most of the time they say "yes" whether it's in English or not, but . . . . . again it's a start.
In some shops, you can ask to view the VCDs on the spot. It's good to check for language, quality, whether it's the same movie as is on the box, etc. In any case always take a look at the physical CD. Many have grooves, fingerprints or scratches, often near the end of the VCD.
Do you have a computer? If it plays CDs you may be able to get software to play VCDs. Screen's small, and the sound's not great, but it works.
"Please, I don't like it spicy":
Try saying "bu la," shake your head, and touch your tongue. Works for my son
every time.
Time to start cooking? Hamburger's easy to get and you can get passable buns (ours always seem to end up having bean paste in them--we're beginning to enjoy burgers with bean paste). We fix a lot of sloppy joes.
Books: "What will I do when I read the last one?"
Maybe you can make some western friends and set up an informal book exchange.
We've even fallen to reading Agatha Christie (and once rereading them). Some
missionaries have a library service. Our kids chew up at least one book a day,
so we just budget in an occasional order to Amazon.com--costs us about $100/month--and
also order boxes of books seabagged from online used book e-mail lists..
Bargaining for auto-rickshaws:
We just show a two kwai note before we get in and say: "(destination)--liang
kwai--duay?"
"I should be honest: I'm frightened, lonely, bored, and angry, by turns, unpredictably . . . . . . . I guess I'd just hoped to tough it out."
Is there an expat hang-out with a special night for foreigners? That's a boon to many here. For fright and loneliness, it's often good to see folks who look more like you. Try your local uni -- they'll probably have foreign teacher housing and you can just sort of hang around and meet folks. Do you have any western colleagues at work? For a first job, it's often good to seek out an environment where trails have already been blazed and there are a few other foreign teachers.
Anger takes getting some distance and reminding yourself that you came to experience something different--and here it is, dammit! It's very hard. And sometimes you do need to get pissed. Chinese do not respect those who show anger, however.
Boredom has been our biggest problem, too. Our teaching hours are exhausting and good, but there's the rest of the day. Keeping our kids from bouncing off the walls in our tiny apartment is a challenge.
Things may not improve--but you will tough it out. Or maybe you won't, and that's OK, too.
A lot of these suggestions seem to hinge on contacting other foreigners. . . . . . we didn't come to China to make friends with westerners, but we're finding that that's (also) an important thing to do.
Two mao's worth.
Liz
Above message is in reply to Xiong's (Dave's), Culture Shocked!
Cultural awareness
John Hibbs writes about compassion and the relevance of the big political issues for our daily life and work, while other subscribers urge us to give up politics and return to issues of teaching. I sympathize with both views.
Writing a book on cross-cultural communication and teaching a course on it, keeps ideas from this field on my mind. Also I often use intellectual strategies to cope with life's dilemmas. So, I have found myself trying to explain the extremely diverse responses to the events of the last week into some kind of framework. One that works for me is Robert Hanvey's categorization of four levels of cross-cultural awareness. I think that when people respond to the "otherness" of Chinese or Western culture, they are responding out of their own level of awareness of the other culture.
Level one -- the unfamiliar culture is different and therefore exotic and entertaining.
Level two -- the unfamiliar culture is different and therefore problematic.
Level three -- the unfamiliar culture is believable in an intellectual way.
Level four -- the unfamiliar culture is believable as lived experience.
Responding to the events of the past week has exposed me to all four levels of awareness on the part of both Westerners and Chinese.
LEVEL ONE -- bizarre and entertaining.
Western version: Wow! political protests. This is exciting. Danger! Even more exciting. (Many posts of last weekend contained the phrase "I read the messages with great excitement.") It may be like 1989. Chinese version: Wow! campus demonstrations. This is exciting China and all the Chinese people are confronting big bad America. This is definitely more interesting than vocabulary and grammar.
LEVEL TWO -- problematic. At this stage, people have more information but little understanding. Arguments are often full of factual information that is marshalled to justify an emotionally held position. (My poor regrets and replies.)
Western version: The Chinese government has not told an accurate story about events in the Balkans. The authorities sanctioned the demonstrations and even provided the means to carry them out.
Chinese version: NATO forces targeted the building. The western media has an anti-Chinese bias. The West under the leadership of the US is hegemonic, seeking to create a uni-polar world or a bipolar world with China as the enemy.
LEVEL THREE -- believable intellectually (cultural differences in how people apologize)
Western version: Objectively speaking, it is safer to live in China than in an American city. Chinese political culture is flawed just as American political culture is flawed. Each culture has its own traditions, its own strengths and weaknesses. Chinese people often respond to signals from leaders. This is as true in politics as it is in the classroom.
Chinese version: Objectively speaking my foreign teacher is responsible, kind, and effective. Politics is politics and learning is learning. American teachers always encourage us to have our own opinions and to defend them with reason. We can argue about these national and international issues in the way we have learned from the West to do it.
LEVEL FOUR -- lived experience
Western version: I can empathize with the grief and the anger even though I am not Chinese. It is hard to believe that technical experts in the most technologically advanced countries of the world could make such a mistake. I remember how difficult and disillusioning it was for me to realize that respected "scientists" can be stupid. I remember how easily I located an "enemy" when something tragic or unjust happened in my life. I will trust the relationships I have with Chinese people. (Story about the woman who invited protestors in from the post on classroom management now.)
Chinese version: I can empathize with the fear and worry my foreign friends are experiencing. I want peace and justice and the people I know from the West want peace and justice too. I know how much Chinese people suffered when people turned on one another for political reasons. I will be civilized in my relationships with the foreigners I know. I will let them know my feelings and trust their ability to understand me and China. (Frequent posts from Eleanor despite the criticism she received.)
This scheme only seems to explain the attitudes of responders. It does not seem to explain the responses of the evaders, those who want to keep the discussion on the list focused on teaching, or at least lighten it up. There must be a way to fit those responses in, but I haven't figured it out. It is like one of Terry's riddles/contests. Impossible for me.
I should also add that I also subscribe to the Oriental list about travel in China. The discussion on that list is mostly level one and level two, while on tefl-China there have been lots of level 3 and level 4 responses. Probably that is because tefl-China subscribers have a higher level of involvement in the other culture and have more effective communication across the two cultures.
